According to popular beliefs, parents love their kids no matter what. However, that is not always the case. A mother from Russia decided to give her son up just because of his Down Syndrome but his dad held him close.
According to a translation of the website RG.RU, 33-year-old Evgeny Anisimov is a single father to his son Misha. The father of one decided to share his story with the world after he felt it would inspire parents who face similar challenges.
Looking back at the time of his son’s delivery, Anisimov stated that the happiness of his birth faded away within minutes. Just one minute and 39 seconds after his birth, the doctor revealed that the child may have Down Syndrome.
Though the doctor only stated a doubt, Anisimov was ready to support his wife no matter what. He even avoided telling his wife about the news thinking it would break her.
“I didn’t know what to do when I learned of the hypothesis that my son had Down Syndrome. I thought my task now was to turn off emotions, ignite thoughts, support my wife because I believed it would be more difficult for her. The results of the analysis we were promised in a few days, and until then, I decided not to say anything to her,” said the man, according to Bored Panda.
Soon, the diagnosis said the kid had Down Syndrome. The man was heartbroken. Recalling that moment, he said, “I remember that upon learning that my son has Down Syndrome, I left the hospital and cried, but not for long. Later, I was a little embarrassed by these tears. In my life, after all, nothing had changed, in general. I was still with two arms, with two legs, my professional knowledge had gone nowhere. My determination, activity, curiosity, and so on—everything was with me.”
He further stated, “Everything happened as I planned, my son was born. But the child is special, his life and future destiny are already very significant. And I’m roaring here! This is some kind of selfishness! Is it not fair? No, it is my responsibility. You did not have an amniocentesis—it is clear that the probability was low, but still. You wanted a child, so you took responsibility for it. After all, there are many options: autism, cerebral palsy, genetic mutations… And Down Syndrome is not the worst, as I learned later.”
Hoping to understand more about his son’s condition, he started reading about it. “When I made the decision, I had not yet thought about the likelihood of an optimistic scenario. I thought: well, he’s going to enjoy the sunrise, I’m going to take him out to barbecue, he’s going to live his life. Yes, maybe he seems unhappy to someone, but he will have his own life. At no time did I think of leaving my son in an orphanage, that would be inhumane,” said the father.
However, his wife did not share the same enthusiasm. It eventually led them to part ways. “My wife and I had always had a good and trusting relationship. But in this case, I was even ready for a conflict, I tried to convince her that we could overcome this situation. And the conflict separated us. Now I understand that she was just scared at the time, she started to act according to the wrong scenario, and by then, the rubicon was already crossed and it was too late to retreat from the scenario,” said the man about his separation.
Soon, Anisimov became a single father to his baby boy. Despite all the challenges that came his way, Anisimov stood by his child. He hopes that every parent would support their children who had similar conditions in the same way he did.
“When a child is born, he asks the outside world: ‘Am I needed here or not?’ And I answer with certainty: ‘Son, you are needed!’ Being with him, even alone, is a normal act for a normal man. I emphasize—I am a normal man, not some kind of hero,” said the humble father.